Wednesday, January 21, 2009

The Eighties Could Have Been Worse

So, you think that the White Sox uniforms in the eighties were the absolute worst in the decade? I've got some news that you might find disturbing. They could have been worse. Much, much worse.

What could be worse than the monstrosities of the eighties White Sox uniforms, one may ask? How about the prototypes of eighties uniforms that didn't make the final cut.

Which would Tom Seaver be more embarrassed to win his 300th game in? The uniform that was pictured in countless newspapers the next day or a aquamarine and tangerine number with a star? How about something with old timey prisoner stripes on the arms? Or something that reminds me of the Bears sweaters that Mike Ditka used to wear? It's a scary thought!

They all suck worse than the uniform that the Sox went with in 1982. No matter how bad things seem, they could almost always be worse.

I'm not sure what the Sox were going for with the aquamarine and tangerine colors. Maybe this was part of the long term plan to move to Florida? For some reason, I think that these would even fail in the sun drenched world of Florida. That many people cannot have heat stroke at the same time to render that abomination fashionable.

In a bold PR move, the White Sox became the only team to put on a fashion show featuring all of their failed designs for the upcoming year. I still can't believe that there is photographic evidence of these glorified pajamas. I just wish I could have found a color photo to fully illustrate the lameness of these choices.

The models look so happy to be promenading these mistakes. Maybe they were drugged. Either that, or they were paid a handsome sum to keep a smile on their faces.

The second uniform from the left is the closest to the final version, but this one still looks like it has a cumber bun attached to the middle. Most of these remind me of things from the bargain bin at Zayre. Get to Zayre and Get It All! Including crappy White Sox failed uniforms.

See, it could always be worse!

13 comments:

  1. The fashion show photo is EXCELLENT. Oh if only it were a card. PS I'm not sure the eighties could have been worse.

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  2. I wonder if you can find these rejected jerseys anywhere to purchase. That Florida-inspired one would be sweet. (in a truly awful kind of way).

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  3. I'm sure that if there is a will, there is a way.

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  4. Those are pretty sweet. I like the third one from the right. The neck-to-sleeve stripe is original. I also like the white stirrups on the second from the left. They remind me of the '69 Sox unis, which I got to see in a turn back the clock game in Milwaukee in 1999.

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  5. Just who was designing those things anyway? :)

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  6. I think all of these were fan designed. Either that or they couldn't come up with anything decent, so they held a contest.

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  7. Most of them look similar to the old Astros design.
    By any chance, are those actual players in the picture? If so, any idea who?

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  8. I'm not sure who they are. They may be office employees, fir all I know.

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  9. Looks like my sock - er, Sox drawer.

    Nice find.

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  10. (gapes slack-jawed at the photos)

    (incapable of expressing articulate speech)

    (mind snaps)

    TEAL AND ORANGE??!?!?!!

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  11. I would probably have to hang my head in shame if they ever wore those when I was a kid. That might have been enough to turn an impressionable kid to the dark, uh, I mean North Side. :)

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