Friday, October 3, 2008

October 3, 2008: White Sox @ Rays

October 3, 2008 - St. Petersburg, Florida

White Sox 2 - Rays 6

Doom in the dome.

The White Sox had their opportunities and blew almost every single one. Mark Buehrle pitched a whale of a ballgame, but could not spark his offense to take advantage of early opportunities. Will the Sox do better at home? One would think so, but I'm at a loss to see how.

The bottom line is that the Sox need to win the three remaining games in order to advance. Can it be done? Sure. Is it likely? Let's just say the odds are not in their favor. This has been a playoff run that has proven the impossible when pushed up to the brink of ending the season. If any team can pull off a series win being down 2-0, it would be the White Sox.

Will they be able to do it? That remains to be seen. The Sox haven't been blown out in either game, but have been largely ineffective in key situations. The Rays haven't been that great, but have taken advantage of almost every opportunity given to them. The Rays aren't that difficult to beat, but they find ways to do so. If the Sox can salvage the series, it will be the biggest upset since 2004, when the Red Sox rallied past the Yankees down 0-3.

Since this game is pretty much a moot point, let's switch to alternative programming, shall we?

Storage Jars
These lovely little items can serve many useful purposes. They can hold things. They can store things. They can hold things and store things securely and airtight, much like a dome holds in air conditioning in the nastiest weather.

The history of the storage jar is an interesting one. Long thought of as a way to keep food fresher, it can trace its roots back to early caveman. The early humanoid would fashion a jar out of earthen soil. Strengthened by fire, this earthen jar would keep predators away from their precious commodities.

Back then it was food. Fresh from the kill, the majority of the food would spoil before it was consumed. Wanting not to stuff themselves and then starve, an intelligent caveman by the name of Tupper, invented the first permanent storage jar made out of carved stone. Many years later, tales of his invention would reach modern day ears and Tupperware was born.

Storage jars have survived famine, war and plagues. They will be on this Earth long after the famed cockroach has expired. It takes a lot to damage a storage jar. It can survive tumbles intact and usually will live on with minimal damage unless a direct hit occurs.

Preservation of objects can be a cinch in storage jars. For instance cheese can last three times longer in a sealed storage jar, than out on the counter. Baseball cards can retain their pack freshness sealed away in a storage jar. Many older issues will find that the smell of bubblegum will remain permeated on the card itself, thus making it more valuable years later.

Storage jars can keep unwanted smells from penetrating your baseball cards. Smells of cigarette smoke and body odor can foul a card with tear inducing stenches. This is best avoided by placing each card in it's own storage jar. This can make collection storage more difficult and space consuming, but your Orlando Cabrera cards would thank you for the extra effort, if they could.

Keeping your baseball cards their freshest can only enhance their potential value down the road. This can be achieved only through the use of individual storage jars. Storing more than one card in a single storage jar can be costly to each card. Each card's molecular structure will bond with one another, devaluing your cards and creating embarrassing side effects, such as Jim Thome's head on Jermaine Dye's body.

What will the future of storage jars be? One can only imagine the great possibilities of the storage jar and all of its storage potential. One can envision a time where each baseball card will have its very own storage jar, maintaining that pack freshness and new card smell.

If you must get the bubblegum smell out of your stored baseball cards, you can sprinkle a minute amount of resin in the jar. This will give off the smells of a pitchers mound and potentially create a unique future sale.

Storage jars and you. The future is here... today.


dayf said...

The two teams I decided to pull for are 0-4.

I am a jinx. :(

night owl said...

Glad to see you keep your sense of humor in light of the situation. (I find it depressing, too). Very entertaining.

Dave said...

I was wondering how you were dealing with the Sox being down 0-2. It's good to see that you're now focused on ... other things ...

Go Rays :)

Steve Gierman said...

I saw a very entertaining piece on storage jars while watching Monty Python, so I decided to implement that in this post. It seemed to be the perfect fit for my mood.

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