Random Card #33

Shawn Abner seemingly had it all. He was a former number one draft pick. How do I know this? I saw it on a 1985 Topps card when I was a kid.

Shawn also played on the White Sox for a brief period of time. I was very excited when I heard that the great Shawn Abner was coming to the White Sox. Why was I impressed? It was the same 1985 Topps draft pick card that I had. That sort of thing impressed me when I was younger. I should have learned my lesson with Cory Snyder, but I didn't.

I thought that the White Sox front office knew what they were doing when they chose players to put on the team back then. Hey, how was I supposed to know? I was just a kid back then.

In fact, it was just recently that I found out that Shawn Abner wasn't actually a Major League ballplayer. In reality, "Shawn" was in the witness protection program and was drafted number one in the country by the New York Mets, because they were the Mets. Who knew that they would actually win the World Series a few years later. A few shrewd moves that panned out and a few lucky picks in the draft and the Mets were a force to be reckoned with in the mid-eighties.

"Shawn" moved from team to team, trying to gain anonymity. It eventually happened, but it took awhile. Now when people say Shawn Abner, most will reply, "Who?"

That's because "Shawn" went back to his real name after his baseball career. There was no more threat, so "Shawn" could go back to being Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein- nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.

Yes, Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein- nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm can go back to his lovely wife, Sarah Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein- nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm and his life of composing classic music.

Little did he know that Karl Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon...

We interupt this blog posting for a much shorter name.

Zisk.

We know return to the Random Card blog posting, already in progress.

... of Ulm.

I would like to thank Shawn Abner for being such a good sport and for accepting his previous role as Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein- nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm.

White Sox Cards salutes you.